Sunday, April 19, 2009

Ectasy and Agony: Upon Viewing Candy Monroe

Do you like tattooed girls doing porn? Of course you do. You're like me. Suicide Girls was like a present from God for our patience. After a while, like me, just seeing them naked wasn't enough. You needed hardcore action. And Joanna Angel and the girls over at Burning Angel became the new gift from the skies. But soon that wasn't enough. They don't put out videos fast enough for you. You indulge yourself upon the new scene then it's a waiting game for the next one. And there are other sites and other movies but you still can't get enough. Are you like me, friend? Do you feel Candy Monroe is God's punishment for asking for too much?

Have you seen Ms. Monroe? She's everything I could want in a tattooed lady. She's cute as button. The hair, the clothes the tattoos are all bright, over the top affairs. And I didn't know this till a few years ago, but apparently throat tattoos drive me wild. Then everything goes downhill from there because this absolutely delicious specimen of a woman does exclusively IR. And not just any IR. She's into Cuckold
Porn. And it's worse than that. In fact it'll turn your stomach.

I've addressed my problems with IR elsewhere. What worries me about Ms. Monroe is that she is obviously following in Spring Thomas' footsteps. I have yet to hear her drop the N-Bomb during sex, but she still nevertheless puts me in awkward positions as a black man. Case in point, just yesterday I was about near the end of one of her scenes when I realized she was wearing a Confederate Army cap, complete with the rebel flag. What am I to do, stop out of indignation? I hate IR.

Cuckold porn sometimes make me uneasy. If it's something like Please Bang My Wife or XXX Proposal where the guy either just watches or joins in for a BJ from his wife, I don't have problem with it. But if the husband's on the couch masturbating, it's a bit distracting and uncomfortable. And if the guy is an obvious twink like the dudes Candy has on, shit, it's downright disturbing. To top it off, she'll humiliate the dude before the scene. Make him wear her clothing and stuff. So basically you're watching a video where there are quite a few shots of a twink in bra and panties masturbating. That is interjected into what is ostensibly straight porn.

But it gets worse. I told you it gets worse. If you've seen a Candy Monroe video before you know exactly what I'm talking about. And no doubt you're as traumatized as I am. For the uninitiated, consider yourselves lucky. I wish I had someone tell me about the shit that was about to go down. Listen closely and prepare accordingly. After the money shot, Candy calls the twink over and makes him LICK IT OFF HER. The first time I saw that, I had to keep my lunch down so I don't throw up all over my computer. Had I still been going when that happened I would've been ruined for life.

The general subject of the cumshot I've written about as well, so I won't rehash it here. But the whole scene had me thinking about just why I found that disgusting. I mean, at this stage of the game I've seen women do unimaginable things with cum. I see cumshots routinely, as a matter of course, just about every single day. Faces, breasts, butt, back, belly, feet. Seen it? Hell I've done it myself numerous times. I've seen girls drink cum out of spoons, coffee mugs, beer bongs, and champagne flutes; out of the mouths, assholes, and pussies of other girls. I've seen girls dip their faces into bowls filled with cum. I've seen dudes line up 100 guys deep and cum on a girls face one after another. I have even seen a girl roll up a twenty and snort a line of cum like it was cocaine. But not a single one of those filled me with nearly as much revulsion as seeing a man do it.

I know I've been inculcated to believe that cumming in woman's face is a normal part of lovemaking, but seeing it done to a guy seems so inherently wrong. If you think you're up to watching that then by all means. But if you're like me, just hit the pause button before it's too late.
Dammit Dammit Dammit!

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