Another Open Letter To Hustler Video

Dear Hustler Video,

You've been watching the news. You, no doubt, know that the race for the presidency is already underway.

I don't know about you, but I look out into the current Republican field and see Porn Parody Possibility. True, Sarah Palin, your muse, has gone out of her way to not run for president. But I'm writing to tell you not to sleep on Michele Bachmann. In fact, you should bank on the number of voters who want to sleep with her.

I guarantee you, right now, someone is googling:

• Michele Bachmann Sex
• Michele Bachmann Naked
• Michele Bachmann Porn
• Michele Bachmann Porn Parody
• Michele Bachmann Bat Shit Crazy Sex

And right now, those folks are coming up with disappointing results.

Supply that demand. Fill that void, so to speak. Because we both know that it's only a matter of time before Romney gets the nomination, the Tea Party loses the loonies, and Bachmann becomes irrelevant again. Make a buck before that happens. Fulfilled the desires of the patriotic while you're at it.

Who will play the Senator from Minnesota, you ask?

Lucky for you, I've already done the leg work.

I present you Lezley Zen. She has the right look. She's

the right age of MILF. Like Lisa Ann, she's an explosive performer who has the ability to literally bring us to our knees. And she looks more like Bachmann

than Lisa does to Palin.

Let's make this happen. There is an audience waiting to watch, ballot in an hand, pants around ankles. Like Who's Naylin Paylin, You could make history again. Let's make this happen.

Best Wishes,

Oruba Stone

Michele Bachmann, Who will Porn Parody You?

Inquiring minds want to know. Before we know it, another election season will be upon us, along with an ancient American tradition dating backto 2008 with the production of Who's Nailin' Paylin? -- the Political Porn Parody featuring the Hot Chick Running.

I look toward U.S Representative Michele Bachmann of Minnesota. Her bat-shit crazy beliefs, and questionable politics aside, or perhaps because of them, she's among the front runners for the GOP's presidential nomination. Her looks and easy Milfness makes her a prime candidate for Porn Parody.

But before we pen this open letter to Hustler, we must decide, Oh Friends, what Milf star will play Rep. Bachmann. in theis absolutely necessary movie.

This is our chance to exercise our patriotic duties as citizens and vote.

After a quick look at the women at My Friend's Hot Mom, I present to you the candidates:

1. Shay Sights - I'm only vaguely familiar with Milf, having only heard and seen hear name over the past year or so. Upon seeing her I see she has a passing resemblance to the Congresswoman. More so than Lisa Ann has to Sarah Palin.

2. Lezley Zen - Resemblance to Bachmann aside, Lezly has been a favorite of mine for years. You and I know, friends, that she'll put on a performance of a lifetime.

3. Sarah Brooks - Not familiar with this woman. She was first face that popped out when I perused My Friend's Hot Mom.

4. Tabitha Stevens - A classic. A woman from my formative years who's finding easy and welcome transition into the brave new world of Milf/Cougar Porn. Perhaps can capture the same demo who flew to Naylin Paylin: Young Men who on the surface just appear to want see a politician naked (or someone who resembles her enough) but are secretly yearning for a golden age.

5. Amy Fisher - We know her as the 'Long Island Lolita." She caused a sensation in the 90s with a tale of sex and attempted murder that was flashed all over the news media for months. She's back in the light as scandal -- as a porn star! After recovering over the shock, you see how much she resemble a certain Representative from Minnesota. Then you realize what you're thinking is totally possible in this world.

Update: You, my faithful readers, have dutifully exercised your right and duly elected your next Porn Parodized Representative. Read the inevitable letter to Hustler Video Here.  

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Who Would You Like To See In The Highly Likely Michele Bachmann Porn Parody?