Monday, May 3, 2010

Make Love Not Porn

I was 25 before it was brought to my attention that some, no, most women don't like getting cummed on. It had been my thing for quite a few years to ask right, when the moment was right, where she wanted me to cum. Most wanted it on the stomach. Some wanted it on their ass. Still others, the keepers, let me jizz on their face.

One night, while wiping off her breasts, my girlfriend at the time quietly said she didn't like it. Like what, I asked. When you cum on me, she said in an even quieter voice. Why did you let me do it then? It's not like I surprised you. I did ask.

I spent that month calling exes and flings. An unscientific poll was conducted. The majority preferred I had kept my fluids to myself. When asked why they'd allowed it, they all answered the same way as sweet, quiet June: it made me happy.

And why did creaming on girls make me happy? Well, a lifetime of porn led me to believe it's what girls like. Oh, the vicious cycle!

There's a site on the internets that spells out more of these Real World/Porn World splits. It's called Make Love Not Porn. I like it. Dear Reader, you should too.


  1. Out of curiosity, did you ask any of them why they didn't like it?

  2. The common answer was that it's undignified. Kind of like getting spat on. Apparently, people don't like that either.