Porn Star Haiku: Jayma Reid

A nameless grace dwells
In this beauty. A tender 
Light glows from within.

Where Oruba Proposes To Start Watching Feminist Porn And The Like For The New Year

Since I crawled out of adolescence and matured into the man I am today, I've been remarkably ambivalent about porn. Remarkable because I can read Catherine Mackinnon and jerk off to bukkake in the same day. I'm particularly sensitive to the objectification of women. I treat my lovers and female friends as equals, as more than the objects of one's fantasies, as whole people. Yet a quick glance at my porn library will reveal hundreds of cummed on faces, gangbangs that look uncomfortably close to rape, women getting poked with an odd assortment of objects, women getting called horrific names while being spit on, women getting passed around, thrown like rag dolls, tossed aside like yesterday's trash. How am I OK with that?

Maybe I'm not. Or, maybe I am.

It's perhaps not immediately apparent, but this blog is an attempt to expose, if not work out, that ambivalence.

I like to think of myself as a person with a strong constitution and the ability to make his actions line up with his beliefs. I was the once Heavyweight champion of smoking, going at it with vigor and poise until I was convinced it would one day killed me. I've been cigarette-free for almost 5 years. I was once an inveterate, indiscriminate, and unapologetic carnivore. These days I only eat meat 6 months out of the year and locally produced at that.

2012 will soon be upon us. On the 1st of January, I will embark on a new project. I will be locking up my usual fare and doing something new. For the entire month of January I will be watching, stroking to, and critiquing my experiences with feminist porn, sex-positive porn, couples porn, artsy porn and any kind of sex flick a guy like me should be watching that doesn't conflict with my real world sensibilities.

Here's how you, dear reader, can help. If you know a site, movie, or starlet that falls into those categories, don't be afraid to suggest it.

The suggestions are already starting to pour in. The insanely delightful Sophie Delancey has recommended Camille Carlson of Art of the Blowjob and Lily Anne Bloom of Pornographic Love.

So yeah, that's where I'll be starting in about a month.

Porn Star Haiku: Miss Bunny

 Henna-haired honey
Who makes my cock hop, my heart
Will miss a few beats.

BBW I Love Love Love #8: Maria Moore

The year was 2003. I was on indulging in my newly discovered BBW interest. I was surfing the nets on my newly acquired broadband tubes.

BBW was only one of the fixations I was exploring. A quick look at my  Yahoo Groups will reveal a love of anime goth girls, ganguro chicks, tied up women, and well, hood rats (I'm really not proud of that).

She was just another girl with a Yahoo Group account. Like many of the other BBW models on Yahoo she posed nude but did no hardcore. As much as I wanted to see the likes of Dawn Perignon do things to a penis, I literally prayed on at least two occasions to see Maria Moore fucked on camera.

I stumbled across my wish quite quickly. She did a scene with the folks over at Bang Bros.


Aside #1: The shoot was for Mom's Anal Adventure but I'm almost positive the scene featured no anal. I could check to be sure but I want to finish writing this post. With Maria, a small diversion could be a few hours of watching porn.


Aside #2: This, I believe, was the moment it hit me that reality porn was not at all real.

At the time, it was a one time thing. She wouldn't return to sex scenes for some years. When she did, I was there waiting.

She beats even Samantha 38G as the BBWs I've loved the longest. I know in my heart, if she continues in this business for another 20 years, I will continue to watch her.

She's been through a lot recently (birth of her first child, cancer). And she's easing her way back into porn.

I'm writing because I've been thinking about our history today, and I feel the need to thank Ms. Moore for the hours of pleasure she's given me over the years. I should not and will not take that granted.

Maria Moore, I love who you are. I love what you do, and I thank you from almost literally from the bottom of my heart.

Porn Star Haiku: Jessica Jewel

Porny, Jewish Milf
From Long Island before it
Was a thing. Come back.

Make Love Not Porn. The Book. The eBook, Really. Reviewed.

Initially intended to be published on Amazon's Customer Reviews. Balked by the "Must Make A Purchase First" Rule

Two scenarios:

1. Porn is plentiful and easy to find.

2. Sex education, an honest conversation about sexuality for that matter, is woefully lacking in our culture.

When the two scenarios co-exist as they do, we get a generation of young people whose first, and often lasting impressions of what sex is and what a sexual encounter has to be like comes from hardcore pornography. This isn’t a slippery slope argument. This isn’t a worst case scenario Dworkin nightmare world. This is what we’re living with right now.

Cindy Gallop isn’t anti-porn (in fact, in many ways, she’s pro-porn). This isn’t like other books of the type, which attempt to demonize porn. Make Love Not Porn attempts to place what we see on our computers screens in its proper context. Gallop shows that a sex life informed only by porn is limiting at best and ultimately unfulfilling.

How does she achieve this?

She places Porn Tropes, or Myths (eg. Where Men Leave Their Leavings, The Everpresence of Saliva, The Baldness Down South, Name Calling During Sex, etc) alongside their real world counterparts and expose them for what they are: myths we don’t have to live up to.

She takes the stories of those of us affected by the way things are, features them to show that we aren’t alone in our confusion when real world sex is nothing like it is in the movies.

Here’s where I fully disclose that I’m featured in this book. I wouldn’t be if I didn’t believe in its premise and mission.

Here’s where I say this book is important and you should read it.

Here's where you can buy it.

Porn Star Haiku: Jacky Joy

If nothing else I'd 
Sing for you, of you and—if
I'm lucky—to you.